No Parking? No Problem.

Have you ever had one of those moments where you think you might be karmically blessed? I mean, not just that you have a knack for luck, but that the Gods of Good Parking Fortune might have actually chosen you as their favorite human? Despite somewhat significant depression (let�s just blame all of this on Ohio because the state is an easy target), I have been riding the wave of the Blessed. Didn�t someone have to perform three miracles in order to be voted in as a saint? Well, in similar fashion, I offer you my evidence:

Instance #1:

Forgetting to pay your parking meter in most cities is a minor deal. When you�re a broke graduate student and your student loans haven�t kicked in despite NUMEROUS freaking trips to the financial aid office (the �aid� in their department name is clearly for appearances only), the $10 ticket you�ll get means you�re eating Ramen noodles for the week. Also, parking offenses are serious business on the Miami University campus, where they pay meter minions to stalk the parking lots like rabid pit bulls hungry for flesh. If you park in the wrong zone, they give you a $50 ticket. If you let the meter run out, they�re waiting. They know.

I have repeatedly (and I mean repeatedly) forgotten to pay my parking meter at work. I�ll put in my two quarters and several hours later, I�ll jump up from my desk and run out of the building because I realize that I�ve haven�t fed the meter and I�m two hours past due. On every occasion, I have walked to my car, fully expecting to see the indignant little slip on my windshield. But no, not me, not She Who Is Shined Upon. My car is cloaked with invisibility. It offends no one. The parking minions can�t even smell my gross car seat covers that are covered in ten-year-old Sprite.

Instance #2:

There is a significant parking shortage on this campus. Freshman aren�t allowed to have cars. I�m not positive, but I think sophomores might also be forbidden to have cars. This does not mean that I won�t spend twenty minutes driving in circles and stalking people in parking lots hoping for a space. But, again, I am experiencing the sunshine of luck. Nearly every time I enter a parking lot, one of my friends says something like, �I can�t believe you think you�re actually going to find a spot.� Then, a car will pull out in front of us and I�ll get a space! This has happened on the packed streets of �Uptown� (their version of �downtown� every place else on Earth), the rows of parking meters in front of the building where I work, and two separate parking lots on campus. I don�t think I�ve ever experienced this type of parking karma before. In Denver, I would drive around like a lunatic and end up parking in an alley with my hazards on while I ran in to pick up take out. I could get used to this royal parking treatment.

Instance #3:

Despite having absolutely no sense of direction whatsoever, I manage to always pick a random back road that gets me where I need to be. Bethany, my only friend in Oxford, says that she�s convinced I bend the universe while in my car. We didn�t know how to get to Jungle Jim�s, a grocery store extravaganza. We ended up taking a side street and driving around in a residential area. Bethany was thinking we should turn around and I suggested staying on the road for just a minute more. Suddenly, Jungle Jim�s popped up out of nowhere. (Aside: a truly amazing shopping experience�I�ll take pictures the next time I go because you definitely need to see this insanity.) There are countless examples of this odd talent, but I won�t bore you. You�ll just have to take Bethany�s word for it.

I�m experiencing magical ju-ju when driving, basically. Is there a Saint of Vehicles? Saint of Great Parking Experiences? Saint of Never Actually Lost Just Taking The Back Road? Who knows? Maybe Edgar passed the torch to me.

*For those of you who don�t know this, Edgar is the beautiful car I had to sell in order to attend graduate school in the middle of nowhere. He had what my friend Janice likes to call �CarMa.�